


Three months ago

by stella2303



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-04
Updated: 2017-03-04
Packaged: 2018-09-28 08:04:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10080590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stella2303/pseuds/stella2303
Summary: The series of events after Acotar in the POV of Rhysand





	

**Author's Note:**

> This came from a group where someone was wondering what rhysand was doing before he winnowed in to crash feyre's wedding.
> 
> Well i took a few months step back and i hope you would enjoy this

 

 

“She is my mate”.

After all those years under the mountain, I have never imagined that those would be my first words to Mor. I knew I looked shocked when I had winnowed back in the town house. Mor was already shaking me with her voice just echoing in my mind.

“Hey Rhys, are you okay? Rhysand?” Mor looked into my eyes. Those golden eyes and her wavy golden locks and everything smelled like home.

“Mor” I whispered and I hugged her tight. Oh how I have missed her. “I’m home” I said and she fondly rubbed my back. Was I crying? I must be. It was just so overwhelming to be back home after so long, so long of doubting I’d ever come back.

“Welcome home, Rhys” she said and returned the tight hug. After a few minutes of hugging, I was smacked by Mor on the chest, of course it hurt like the mother but I think I did deserve it. “That is for being an idiot!” She smacked me once again, “You thought after all these years I’d forget about your stupid decision?! That was selfish and stupid!” she shouted then pulled me back again for a hug. “I know you’re stupid but I’m just glad that you’re back and safe”. I understood her frustration

“I know it was stupid and I’m sorry”, I said admitting to my mistakes.

“You can say sorry by telling me about this mate of yours. I hope she can pin your balls on the wall whenever you make stupid decisions” she said fondly as she sat herself on the couch waiting expectantly for some explanation. I just looked at her and said

“No. I don’t want to talk about Feyre right now” damn I slipped.

“Hmm Feyre huh? What is she like?” Mor said enthusiastically. I tried to give her a deadpan expression. “You do know I will bug you forever about this unless you start talking now” she just said. True, she wouldn’t let me hear the end of this and better explain now than tell it to the whole circle.

“Fine” I just said. So I told her, starting from what happened under the mountain, what I was forced to do, how I was about to lose hope from the nightmares of what I did, and my dreams of hope – my dreams of Feyre. I told her how we met on fire night and how I convinced Tamlin to drive her away to safety. How she returned under the mountain, how I tried to protect her, to fight Amarantha and eventually resurrect her. And how I wanted to see her one last time and our mating bond snapped into place. Of course Mor being Mor just laughed herself crazy when I said I ran away from shock.

“This is why this stays between us got it?” I told her.

“Awww the most powerful high lord of Prythian scared to be laughed at by his friends?” she teased. I gave her the look asking her for a little space of privacy. “Oh all right” she rolled her eyes, “I never heard a thing”.

A few minutes later, we heard a loud pounding on the door. “Hey Mor! Azriel said he felt Rhys come back already!” Cassian was shouting on the other side of the door. I went on to walk to the entryway and open the door myself.

“Yes he is back why are you asking?” I said casually. Cassian just looked back at me stunned. It was a rare moment when we see “stunned” in Cassian’s expression, so I smirked at him which earned me a punch on the face.

“You stupid son of a prick!” Cassian shouted.

“I know I deserved it” I told him as I tried to stand up but he punched me another time which sent me lying on the floor. The cassia offered his hands to me

“welcome back bastard” he said grinning then pulled me up for a hug as well. Azriel was merely watching from the door.

“Ah I was right, welcome back. Good to know you are safe” he just said and walked to the living room to join Mor.

Cassian only tilted his head for me to know what was up with Azriel. ‘You owe him an apology. Between the four of us, Az was the one who blamed himself too much’ Cassian said in his thoughts. I gave him a nod and entered the living room. I strode towards Azriel who was sitting on the sofa.

I extended my hand to him and said “thank you for keeping Velaris safe on my behalf”. He merely looked up. I was bracing myself for another punch. Az stood up and swung his fist towards my jaw but nothing came. His fist gently bumped my jaw and said “Next time” and he smiled a little. I smiled back.

After a few days, the hype of my return has died down within my inner circle. I often flew over Velaris, engulfing the sight, re-studying a home I have missed so long. But it never really felt so complete right now. I have never known her for a long time and yet I feel like a part of my home is missing. I wish she could see this, one day see Velaris. I looked at my hand and was reminded of our bargain, ‘No I can’t’. Then I thought about it again, ‘maybe one last time’. And I silently dismissed the thought.

_I was pinned down on my own bed. I struggled but I couldn’t get free “Now now that’s just pointless and you know that Rhysand”. I shivered at the sound of that voice. “No you’re dead!” I breathed. “Am i? Maybe” and she appeared crawling over my naked body. She was wearing a red chiffon dress that blew away on a phantom wind. “But I’ll never be dead in your dreams. After all this is where I’ll live now” she purred long nails grazing over my torso. “Where I will kill you then kill Feyre after” she was holding the knife overhead and plunged it down my heart. I looked down my chest and blood spilled. “I’m so sorry” it was now Feyre who was holding the knife. “I’m sorry rhysand” she whispered. “She said she would free Tamlin if I killed you” she whispered with teary eyes. “Now Feyre darling, last one” and Amarantha gave Feyre another ash wood dagger. A figure was kneeling in front of me his face covered in sack. “Now Feyre, one last and Tamlin will be free” Amarantha lifted the sack and revealed…. Cassian! “No!” I tried to scream a protest. But I couldn’t scream anymore, I was dead. “Feyre no!” I screamed and shot up sweating wrapped in darkness, the cool night air billowing in my room. “Just a dream” I tried catching my breath as I raked my fingers on my hair. “I got out, I got out” I repeated the mantra Amren told me. She said she knew the look I had and moving on after being a prisoner would not be easy. Telling myself that I got out might help lessen the nightmares._

“Report” I said sitting on my throne one day visiting my court of nightmares, wearing the cold mask of the high lord of the night court. I have been in a good mood since last night. In high spirits in fact that’s why this visit is good I thought. “My lord”, Kier began, “repairs in the hewn city is going well. News about Lady Artisa to be married off to Captain Malorn in a fourth moon requests for your blessing”. I merely gave him a nod. Weddings for a sense of normalcy, yeah right, but who am I to hinder their merry making? I’m not a God to stop such celebrations. “And news from the spring court” kier’s words piqued my interest, “their high lord would be wed in two moons to Feyre Cursebreaker”. “What?” I sad without thinking. “Well well looks like our little golden boy is getting his fairy tale ending after all.

 

I wanted to punch a mountain! Roar and scream out my frustration to Tamlin’s face ‘No! Your lazy ass does not deserve my mate! Not at all! You never tried to save her, not really. You just sat there as Amarantha destroyed her!’ I have crushed a boulder with my fist and whirled the debris to hit a mountain side. “You don’t deserve Feyre you bastard!” I said it out loud. But then I thought about her, what did Feyre want? And I knelt down resigned. He didn’t force her to marry her. Feyre wanted to Marry Tamlin. “So you want this really?” I just smiled talking to a rock imagining that I was talking to her. Tears had made its way back to my eyes. “As long as you are happy with him then I’ll understand”.

I felt so hallow right now, like I’m walking and talking out of habit. I couldn’t even remember things I’ve told Mor and Cassian. A pinch from Amren would bring me back to the world from time to time but other than that, I felt so lost. I should’ve told her before we parted. I shouldn’t have been scared of our bond. ‘But what if she never loved me like that really. ‘She barely knows you bastard’ I thought. “Cauldron, if only you’d grant me one more chance with Feyre” I said whispering my wish in the air and only the stars as my witness.

I woke up late one night with the image of Feyre hurling her guts down the toilet. I tried to concentrate and think about her and figure out what was happening. Nothing but puking and there was no sign of anyone helping her out. I paced in my room. I wanted to help her, be there for her, and ease her pain. ‘Call in the bargain’ the voice at the back of my mind called to me. “Then what? Hey Feyre I have a nice room in the night court where I can guarantee its nightmare free!” I swatted the idea away and went down to get myself a bottle of whiskey to drink as I wait and watch for the sunrise in the garden.

 

“Let’s go drinking tonight” I told Cassian who just looked at my smirk with curiosity. “Only if the bill is all on you” he smirked back. “First one to pass out” I wagered. “Bring it on, prick” he said mischievously. Tonight was Feyre’s wedding. At least with the alcohol, I won’t be able to feel any pain the moment she says I do. We have already positioned ourselves on the bar. Clinked our glasses, my brooding face on when I heard her.

_Help me, help me, help me._

“Feyre” I breathed out. Something was wrong. Cassian was trying to tell me a story about two friends who got into a fight over a girl just the other day but I shushed him trying to listen closer because that might just be a figment of my drunken imagination. We’ll a glass of drunken imagination.

_Save me – please, save me. Get me out. End this._

I heard her voice again. I placed my glass down and winnowed without a word to Cassian. I winnowed towards her, to Feyre. And right before my eyes, she was there. Skinny, frightened and very very poofy. “Hello, Feyre darling” I purred.                                

**Author's Note:**

> So what do you guys think?


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